I Will Track You Down…

Have you ever left your car running so you could run in “quickly” to do something? Yeah, me too. This particular day I was dropping my daughter off at daycare and left my car running as it was pretty cold outside and I always did this. I had been in the daycare long enough to take off my daughters coat and boots and walk her to her class, I’d say maybe 3 minutes tops, truth was I was rushing because I was running late for an exam at school, I know that’s a fucking shocker. My school was almost directly across from the daycare and right next to a local high school.

As I walked down the steps towards my car I didn’t see it, I was puzzled for a minute so I looked around the parking lot thinking I just forgot where I parked my car. My Honda was nowhere in sight. Crystal, who I’ve known for a million years happened to be dropping her child off at the time I was trying to come to terms with my vehicle vanishing. She could tell something was wrong so she asked “is everything ok” and I replied “I think someone stole my fucking car” I was still puzzled to be honest trying to accept this had just happened. Then all of a sudden my adrenaline kicked in and I turned around and started running towards the street from the daycare parking lot. Crystal stood there puzzled looking at me. I got to the end of the parking lot and low and behold I could see my stolen car! There it was, sitting at a red light, I kid you not, this fucker stole my car and sat at a red light 100 feet away from where he stole it from. I started yelling ” You motherfucker bring my car back here” as I started running like Forrest Gump towards my car. Probably wasn’t a good idea since he saw me in the rear view mirror and heard me yelling profanities.

Through all of this I heard Crystal yell “I’m coming”. Which didn’t kick in until a few seconds later. As I got closer to my vehicle and he saw me coming he literally put his blinker on and turned right down Main St (NSCC intersection on Main St for any local people reading this). I couldn’t run fast enough to get to him before he made the turn. That didn’t matter though because every super hero has another super hero helping them fight crime. All of a sudden I had stopped running, I broke down in tears…I was standing in the middle of the street wondering what the fuck I was going to do and then…it happened.

Crystal pulled up on the side of me and said “get in, which way did he go?” Well this motherfucker was about to get jacked the fuck up by two super heroes. We looked down Main St, we couldn’t see him…we thought the effort had been lost. Things were happening so fucking fast, but we were focused trying to figure out which way he could’ve went. We turned down a side street, he was nowhere in sight, we had lost him. I called 911 during our high speed chase and gave them my exes address so they could meet me there so I could file a report. We were a block away from where my ex baby daddy and his family had just moved to. We turned onto my exes street and about 2 blocks away was my car….parked…with a big ole teenager getting out of it with his backpack. This motherfucker literally parked the car on the street right where I was going to, the universe was working in my favour.

Crystal sped the fuck up like a mad woman and slammed on her brakes when we got to him, just like a scene from the Fast & Furious. We jumped out of the car and we both ran towards him, I started freaking out on this fucker. “Give me my fucking keys you little prick” I yelled at him. He was tall, like tall tall…and big, like a bear but I can tell you one thing he was scared shitless of us. Crystal was yelling at him, I was yelling at him he didn’t know what to do. He mumbled some bullshit about how some guy stole my car and he tracked him down and took the keys and was going to bring them back to me…Well me and Crystal fucking lost it on him….we knew this prick was lying… I was in his face like I was going to pull some moves from the UFC, I thought I could beat him in that moment, I really did…We were going on so bad screaming in his face telling him how he was about to take an ass whoopin then he through the keys and took off running through a path in the woods. As he turned to run I pushed him, hard, but he didn’t fall down or anything just thought it was important to note that I physically assaulted him like any good super hero woman would.

The police arrived with the dogs and tried to track him down, no luck. I got my car back and everything was still in it but to tell you the truth I was fucking pissed that someone had stolen from me. Like any good superhero I started to putting the pieces of the puzzle together. He was a teenager, he clearly went to high school…and it had to be the high school next to my school, I was sure of it. I waited every day for about 2 weeks at the daycare watching the kids walk to high school and never spotted him so I gave up…maybe he had quit school because of this, I really didn’t know.

A month later my husband and dad were driving me to school. We pulled up to turn into my school entrance, which shared an entrance with the high school. I made eye contact with this guy and shouted “that’s the mother fucker who stole my car”. That prick took off running like Usain Bolt! My father yelled “stop the car” and jumped out and started running after him. I jumped out and started running after him, yelling to my husband “stay in the car” because my daughter was in the car too…2 against 1, pretty good fucking odds if you ask me! My father smelled him out like a hound dog…the boy had ran into a class room and was hiding under a desk in the back of the room. The teacher was confused, the cops were called and the little prick apprehended.

I didn’t end up pressing charges, honestly he was a stupid kid who did a stupid thing so he was forced to face his victim…that was me just in case you’re wondering…with his family and apologize and ask for forgiveness…which I granted him. After the official apology session I walked over to him and pulled him aside and said “I bet you were surprised I caught you weren’t you?” he said “I have thought about you running towards me screaming at me while I was waiting for the light to turn green…I was never that scared in my life, then when you showed up with that other woman, I thought you two were going to kick my ass and I was so happy to get away and then the day you spotted me going to school…I thought I could get away from you but I just couldn’t , trust me I will NEVER do something that stupid ever again, ever.” ~Holla