I didn’t get a good sleep last night, my daughter slept with me. This means my king size bed turned into a single mattress for me. We are not going to make it if this continues.
I asked my daughter to cook me breakfast while I worked. She put hash browns in the oven and disappeared. I had to take an early break and cook my own breakfast. I almost burned the house down when I left the frying pan on the stove top heating up. It wasn’t until the smoke started to fog my computer screens that I noticed that I had forgot I was cooking breakfast. I put that vegan bacon in that pan and it was cooked in 3.5 seconds. Life is grand.
As I sat at my “dining room table desk” and gazed out my window like I was lost in space, I realized my windows were dirty so I took a quick break from gazing, I mean working and cleaned them. Don’t worry boss it was a reasonable break period.
Shit…they’re coming for us! No. Wait. That’s just a human walking her dog with a fucking bright yellow highlighted vest on. It’s daytime lady, we can all see you no need for this extra bright we’re coming to get you vest on.
I told my middle son to apply for “unemployment”. He took a while to reply back but when he did he said “you mean employment insurance?” I’m about to throw the whole kid away at this point, don’t correct me son, you know what the hell I meant…I’ve reached this age of thinking now.
The phone scammers have upped their efforts…they know we’re all home answering our personal calls while working. 10 calls in an hour from Guyana is a bit much. They do have 4 cases of the virus but all 4 people were family members. I’d say they are in good shape and we are about to be bombarded with excessive phone scams from all around the world. Also, NOT ONE friend called me today…Ya’ll know I’m still working from home right?
I put my headphones on and pretend I am on calls when my daughter tries to talk to me. I just do the point at the headphones and mouth “I’m on a call” and she leaves. I’m winning here.
Shit guess what? UPS is still delivering parcels. I bought two BBQs online 2 days ago from Canadian Tire (10 minutes away from me) and low and behold UPS is an essential service. Don’t worry about why I bought two BBQs, Ya’ll really newsy for wondering.
Two elderly people walked by and they were looking at my broken tree in my front yard, they even pointed….so fucking judgey!
I didn’t eat lunch or shower until 5pm today. I really don’t have any reason why I didn’t. I started to get a headache and realized I was hungry. So know this if we’re dating and I get a headache, bring me food. Not you the fake vegan delivery man…you’re on the shit list….Unless, you actually bring me food and I hope you’re not reading this while you poop today…this blog is way classier than that.
I ventured out today…A few of the “essential” necessities will no longer be available after midnight. Being the VIP client I am…guess who got her lashes done today?
I swear this Boomerang better work because this picture is not cute by any means…PRESS PLAY
Until Day 4…Be safe, remember to laugh at yourself and definitely at others, snarl your face up at anyone who comes close to you and remember every day is a blessing.
Don’t forget to share if this made your day just a little brighter, maybe someone else needs a smile today too. #sherryannecrowe